Monday, June 29, 2015


So unlike most of my posts, this one doesn't have a point other than thanking each and every one of you!!! I recently reached over 1,000 views on a post ( and I am so excited about it! That's only the second time I've ever done that, and the other post I had originally put on here had to be deleted. So, on my stats this is the first time I've reached over 1,000! I felt so so strongly about that post and urged people to share it if they agreed and you guys made it happen for me! Some might think I'm being dramatic or over-reacting, but I take this blog very seriously and I couldn't be happier with the (little) success I'm getting!
Alsoooooo... my blog is almost at 20,000 views! I'm at nearly 18,000 right now and would love to reach 20,000 soon! 
All of my ideas and words are nothing without readers, so it's because of you guys that I'm even here. With all of the support and positive feedback and sharing and comments you guys have given me have encouraged me to keep doing this (and more of it!)
So again, without being dramatic, I really do want to thank you guys for all of the support you have shown me. I love each and every one of you guys and love hearing your feedback!

Saturday, June 27, 2015

♡swim suit fashion!♡

today i wore a vintage floral swimsuit that was passed down to me since i was young topped off with a messy top knot bun w/ bandana! 
(sorry i don't have the sourcing but a few cute places i like to shop for suits is forever 21, dillards, target & pac sun!)

no matter the reason for your swim suit choice, a one piece is always a classy choice! you can dress it up to be sexy (open back, open seams) or modest depending on your style.
you can also wear jewerly with your one piece to add dimension to your look- bracelets, necklaces, head pieces and ankle bracelets are some of my favs!
a tip i have for adding jazz to your one piece is picking the least used color in your suit and adding an accessory to make it pop! aka my green bandana to bring out the leaves in my dress! this technique makes your outfit seem much more put together.
 one pieces are great for so many reasons! one pieces are easy and never need re-adjusting throughout the day. just grab one, put it on, and don't worry about it falling off for the rest of your fun in the sun! one pieces also give you less exposure to the sun, which is good if you're out and about often to let your skin breathe! 
one pieces are great for people that are insecure about their body, mainly for the reason that it covers most of you while still being a swim suit. however, even if you are confident in your body, one pieces are actually very flattering without being flashy like normal skimpy bikinis! i love a good ole one piece every once in a while. 
 whatever the reason for your choice to wear a bathing suit, own it! all bodies look equally beautiful in bikinis, tankinis and one pieces regardless of shape, color, or size!!!

ps- i will actually be selling a bunch of my old clothes (including swim suits) soon so be on the look out to buy for great prices!

Friday, June 26, 2015

I'm a Christian + this is my view on equality

Romans 3:23 "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God"

Recently in the news, there has been wide-spread discussion on equality whether it be through transgender, race, sexuality, or other issues. In case you have not heard, earlier today the Supreme Court ruled that marriage equality will now begin in all 50 states. There has been an uproar since I woke up this morning and checked my social media. I follow varying popular accounts from "feminism4u" to "instagodministries" and what I found on the comments section was truly appalling. When I read the comments among the so called "liberal" postings, they were filled with encouragments and positive energy. When I read the comments under the Bible accounts I follow, I wasn't expecting the same response as before. After all, it IS a sin in the bible to be gay. But I wasn't expecting to read what I did. I came across all sorts of nasty and crude comments from "Gay people will rot in hell" to "Gay people don't deserve to live" to the one I am sharing below.

This woman was debating people left and right on the post that I was reading, so I decided to give her the benefit of a doubt and try to understand what she was saying. I've tried to agree with her. I've kept my mouth shut through the recent months because of my faith. I wanted to agree with what a fellow believer said. I've tried to keep my opinion to myself. But I can't do it anymore.

This woman made claims left and right that are simply false about the Bible. She starts off by saying "If you are still sinning, you are not a Christian." As I attached at the very beginning of this post, Romans 3:23 says differently. The fact that a woman can make the statement that she does not sin, shows me how little she knows of The Lord and his everlasting goodness. Since the beginning of time when Adam and Eve were in the garden, sin entered the world. It has taken many different forms throughout the years, but nonetheless still prominent. It doesn't matter if you're gay, a criminal, transgender, black, white, boy, girl, anything. You sin. You sin every single second of every single day. There would be no point in Jesus dying on the cross if we were perfect, like Him. The whole point of the Gospel is that God sent his son to die for us, so that we may live. He died on the cross to cover our sins. She continues in her argument, believing that if you have sinned, you will not enter Heaven. This part makes me really, really sad. Because this woman, a self proclaimed believer, seems to be confused on the entire part of the gospel. Ephesians 2:8-9 "For by grace you have been saved by faith. And this is not your own doing, is is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast." If our eternal salvation was based on our works, no one on God's earth would be able to enter Heaven. That's the point of how incredible our God is- that he gives us eternal life, although we all don't deserve it. No matter what you do, if you have Jesus in your heart, you are a Believer. One of her final points is that there is no such thing as a gay Christian. This one really hit me hard. I know a lot of people that are in the LGBT community. And I'm not going to say that they are all great people, or even that all of them are christians. Because that's not true. Not everybody that is straight is a good person, or even a christian. But I have met a fair amount of people fighting for equality, and I found something about them that I don't think most people, or Christians for that, know. It's an earth-shattering fact and something that might shock you. Here it is: They aren't so far from us.

I'm a 19 year old female. Straight. White. Christian. Go to a Christian college. Go to church every Sunday. From the outside in, I'm a good person. But that couldn't be further from the truth. I sin. Every day. I live in my sin and I like my sin because it makes life easier. I'm addicted to my sin. I crave to rid myself of it, and pray to the Lord every night to rid me of it, but I wake up every morning still the same. I wake up in the morning and sin until the sun goes down, every day. No exceptions. I lie and lust and cheat and disobey and thrive in my sin. But people don't talk down on me, because I'm a 19 year old female. White. Christian. Go to a Christian college. Go to church every Sunday.

But what about this...

I'm a 22 year old male. Gay. Black. Christian. Go to a Christian college. Go to church every Sunday. From the outside in, I'm a bad person. I sin. Every day. I live in my sin and I like my sin because it makes life easier. I'm addicted to my sin. I crave to rid myself of it, and pray to the Lord every night to rid me of it, but I wake up every morning still the same. I wake up in the morning and sin until the sun goes down, every day. No exceptions. I lie and lust and cheat and disobey and thrive in my sin. But people talk down on me, because I'm a 22 year old male. Gay. Black. Christian. Go to a Christian college. Go to church every Sunday.

By us Christians judging and condemning other for their actions, puts us on a pedestal. What we are saying is "Gay people live in sin every second?! What a terrible thing to do!!!" as if we don't do the same exact thing. Although I am not gay, I do know gay people that wish they were not that way. And they try to suppress it. And they live in denial. But somehow, the truth always comes out. If you are not gay, or trans, you cannot imagine what it is like to feel that way. To feel lost every single day. To feel different, and to be bullied for it. 

•   81.9% of students who identify as LGBTQ were bullied in the last year based on their sexual orientation (National School Climate Survey, 2011).
•    Nearly half of young transgender people have seriously thought about taking their lives, and one quarter report having made a suicide attempt.
•    Suicide attempts are nearly two times higher among Black and Hispanic youth than White youth. [7]
•   LGB youth are 4 times more likely, and questioning youth are 3 times more likely, to attempt suicide as their straight peers. [2]
For the record, I do believe that being gay is a sin.
I do believe that changing your gender is a sin. 
I do believe that lying is a sin. 
I do believe that lusting is a sin.
I do believe that disobeying your parents is a sin. 
I do believe that sex before marriage is a sin.
I do believe that judging is a sin.
I do believe that cheating is a sin. 
I do believe that gossiping is a sin.
I do believe that pride is a sin. 
But who am I to pick and choose which sins are worse? Sin is sin and sin is terrible, but we all do it. Regardless of your race, gender, sexuality, etc- you are a sinner and the amazing thing about God is that He loves you anyway.

If I didn't know better and I was told the definition of Christian and was shown the 2 different posts to read the comments under, I would choose the liberal post as Christians. I'm disgusted that Christians response to society today is so often bullying, bashing, and abusing other people. As Christians, we are called to love everyone. Not just people with the same race as us. Or gender. Or sexuality. Or income. Or beliefs. Or style. John 13:34-35 says "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” By constantly pointing fingers and judging others, we are teaching the outside world that Christians hate non-Christians. As the verse says, if we love others, that is how people should know we are Christians.

I've always been an accepting person, and I'm glad I am that way. I'm glad I can walk down the street and not be filled with hatred, like so many. I do not believe homosexuality is right, but I will choose to look past the sin and look at the person. If I was defined by all of my sin, I would be hated too. Just because certain people's sin is evident to the world doesn't make it any more than yours. I will hate the sin and love the sinner, because that's the very reason I have eternal life.

Looking down upon someone because they are different than you has to stop, and it has to stop in the Church. We need to help the people that need help. And we need to witness to people that need to be witnessed to. Our response cannot be hatred anymore. Our response can be love.

To any people viewing this post that have suffered through inequality for any reasons-
I am sorry on behalf of the Church. I am sorry for not letting you feel welcome to come join the sunday school class. I am sorry for belittling your problems. I am sorry for blaming you. I am sorry for not welcoming you with open arms into my house. I am sorry for judging you. I am sorry for thinking I am better than you. I am sorry for grouping you into categories you do not belong to. I am sorry for not loving you as Christ loves you and me.

To any person that is in the Faith and is made uncomfortable by this post-
I didn't make this post to be comfortable. I did it because it needs to be said. I am sick and tired of Christians hating on people that do not live life the same way they do. Just because someone doesn't share your interests or values or faith does not mean you cannot love them the same, and eventually, through that love, point them to Christ.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

"i wrote this for you and only you; please find this"

was doing some late night poetry reading by the book "please find this" written by an anonymous author and decided to share some of my favorites :) :)

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Just because you can't train your boyfriend doesn't mean you should lower your standards // My problem with TSM

I am, yet again, appalled by another "Total Sorority Move" post. This post (which you can read for yourself here: is focused around the very real fact that some people (no need for gender stereotypes!) try to train their partners. I had high hopes for this post, since I do agree that we should be able to be comfortable in a relationship enough to let our significant other breathe. But I couldn't help but disagree with almost everything that I read. Here's why:

"...even if, deep down, he secretly wonders what she looks like naked, that doesn’t mean he’s going to act on it. He still has a **** , and that’s not his fault."
Wait, I'm sorry, did I read that right? Did I just read that I should be okay with my boyfriend lusting over other women as long as he didn't act on it because it "isn't his fault"?? That's exactly what TSM is saying here. Now ladies, don't get me wrong. I do know that we live in a fallen world of lust, especially since we are in such a sex-dominated culture. But if you are a woman of any worth, hear my words loud and clear. The man for you should NOT be spending his time lusting over other woman. I'm not saying he never will, because chances are, he unfortunately will. But that does NOT make it right. Find a man that is satisfied in you and you alone. Matthew 5:28 states, "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." A man worthy of your heart will not cheat on you- whether it be physically or emotionally. If your boyfriend does struggle with lust, he will not simply ignore it and continue in his sin. He will work on it, and take the proper precautions to stop it. (Ex: having certain websites blocked, repenting, being honest with you in his struggle) And in the same sense, women- don't go see movies like Magic Mike if you don't want your boyfriend seeing 50 Shades of Grey. Sure Channing Tatum looks great shirtless, but so do the women that you don't want your boyfriend watching. Lust goes both ways, regardless of gender.

"...this doesn’t mean you should drive yourself crazy trying to prevent your boyfriend from hooking up with someone else. If your boyfriend is going to cheat, let him."
I really do get what they are tying to convey here. They're (in their own very twisted way) trying to relay the fact that no matter what precautions you take, if your boyfriend is going to cheat, he will no matter the actions taken beforehand. But here's what I say to that- if you're dating a guy that you believe will cheat on you, don't let him. Don't even give him the chance to cheat on you. If you're dating someone you cannot put your trust in and are paranoid every second of the day that they will be unfaithful, that's reason enough to end the relationship. Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Getting into a relationship is a very serious thing. If you believe he will not be able to give you the faithfulness you desire, guard yourself and your heart from any future pain. Chances are, unless it's all in your head, if he's giving you reason to worry, he will act on it. If he's being shady, or lying, or making you feel uncomfortable, end it. Don't continue in a relationship that always causes you stress. Relationships are built on trust. If you don't have that, it will ultimately fall apart sooner or later. You will find someone that makes you comfortable enough to be able to trust them, without it being a struggle. Simply lowering your standards to fit the man you're with will only hurt you. Wait for the man that loves you in a way you never have to doubt.

" can’t force loyalty; the best you can do is do your part to prove that you deserve it..."
It is not your job as a woman, or a human being for that matter, to prove you deserve loyalty to anyone. If you are in a relationship in which you believe you must prove that you are deserving of loyalty, chances are you won't get it. Loyalty should be an easy thing to give to someone you love, or are committed to. It shouldn't be earned after any certain amount of time, or after the proper amount of actions were taken. You deserve loyalty always, you don't need to prove that you do. So, what should you wait for? 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 tells us. "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." This is what love should be like- not having to work overtime to train your partner.

With this all being said, I do understand what TSM is trying to say. I just think they had a terrible way of communicating it. Simply put- men or women should not control their partner in a relationship. You should be able to trust your significant other enough to go out, have fun, have a normal day without you checking up on them. And if you don't trust your partner enough for that, for whatever reason, you have the right to end it and start over again. Relationships should be happy and easy, not straining and stressful on your every day life.

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Happy Father's Day!

dress: american apparel $15
lipstick: target $8
shoes: forever 21 $30 

hope everyone has a lovely day with their daddies!

Saturday, June 20, 2015

♡ today's vibes! ♡

saturday, june 20th 2015

oversized sweater: h&m $10
printed socks: topshop $6
black converse: journeys $60
nail polish: pastel pink w/ sparkle top coat
jewerly: different places including forever 21, claires, & yurman

hi everyone!!! hope you're all feeling ♡PINK♡ this afternoon! this is one of my first purely fashion based posts! these pictures are all things from today that created a very cute pink theme for me! hope you enjoy!! 
ALSO: should i dye my hair pink??? i edited it in one of the pictures above and am quite fond of it! i've loved unnatural hair colors for as long as i can remember and am thinking of doing it :)

Friday, June 19, 2015

thoughts of nothingness on an airplane

so it's been a while. i'm sorry i haven't kept up with my writing, but there are a few reasons why. the main reason is that i simply haven't had much time to spare. in the past month, i've traveled from turks and caicos in the caribbean, to the lake, to new york city. it's been hectic but i have enjoyed every single second of it. i've also found myself turning to writing my thoughts down on paper rather than type, but i will soon be copying those to put on the blog. so thank you for being patient with me while i have been less than consistent in my posting. 

i'm writing this from 6,000 miles in the air as i leave the city that never sleeps. this trip was taken with my mom, and it's the first girls trip we've ever had. (and man did we have a blast!) as i type this onto my iphone, i have a million thoughts buzzing through my head. i just left the busiest city in the world and i'm returning home in 3 short house to my home in memphis. i'm excited to be home and see my family and spend time with loved ones and my pets, but i have this craving inside of me that just somehow can't be filled. i want to be doing bigger things. i'm not belittling at all the fact of how blessed i am that i have had the privilege of being able to travel to these amazing places over the past couple of weeks. i'm simply stating that i want more. i want to see the earth. and i don't mean i want luxurious vacations upon ocean front resorts, i just mean that i want to see more of the world. traveling is such a beautiful experience i hope everyone gets the chance of feeling one day. i'm addicted to the adrenaline i get when the plane gets off the runway and the way everyone has a place to be and everyone is in their place. i pass people walking upon the sidewalks of new york and i wonder how they got so fortunate to call such a lovely city home. do they work twice as hard as the normal person? is their apartment tiny in jersey or overlooking central park? did they get money passed down? and then i look at the homeless men on the alley streets of turks and caicos and i wonder how they got there in the first place. is it their birth place? do they have family? do they like the ability to see the ocean every day, despite their circumstances? i have so many thoughts and all of my thoughts just make me want to travel MORE. i want to go to africa and look into the eyes of a starving child and be able to help them eat for the night. i want to rent a one bedroom apartment in the middle of london and take hot baths and work in the city. i want to be climbing mountains and feeling as if my feet can't take another step until i reach the top and realize it was all worth it. i want to go on little ships and ferries and subways and trains and planes and busses and safaris and trails and lose the idea that i have to know where i'm going at all times. wandering aimlessly can be a wonderful thing and i want to be able to fall asleep on the subway and miss my stop only to find how the city lights look at night. i want the messiness of a crappy apartment and i want to sit on my window and eat take out every night. i want to travel and i don't know if my dreams align with reality but i want to be able to get the chance to see for myself. 

lately i've been feeling rather lost. and not in the sad kind of way where i can't see a destination ahead. simply put: i know God has a plan for me. i know he has everything to the inth degree figured out for my life. and i know i'm destined for greatness. i just don't know what that would be. i think most people  by their 20s know what they want to do with their life. they know what their "thing" is. and i don't. luckily, i'm not quite 19 yet, but college really does put a stress on figuring out your life. don't get me wrong- I have lots of options and i would be happy doing many, many different things for my life. I just wish i knew what it was, so i could pour all of my soul and energy into it now instead of having to wait 2 years into college to decide what i want to do. when i think of my friends and the people i care about, i can go down the list and name out what each person's thing is. so why can't i do that for myself? i guess that most people's guess would be that my thing is writing. and if i had to pick right now, i would agree. but writing isn't the only thing i know and love. i love so many different things it scared me at times because it can be so overwhelming. i love writing blogs and poems and songs and short stories and excerpts. i love helping people and the immediate high i get after i know i made an impact on somebody. i could see myself being a therapist and listening to the girl that feels like her life is falling apart, and convince her it's not. i could see myself being a teacher and teaching literature or english or writing. i love singing and music and listening to music and concerts and singing until my throat is raw. i love animals of all sorts with such a passion i can barely contain it. i could see myself being a vet or a foster home for an animal or a humane society employee. i love photographs and how it captures a moment in still air. i love black and white pictures and i love editing pictures and i love taking pictures. i could see myself being a wedding photographer or a photo editer. i love spreading the word of God and could see myself being a full time missionary. i could see myself getting a job in the church i'm involved in. i could see myself being a stay at home mom. i could see myself being a fashion designer. or a home designer. i love books and reading words and i could see myself being an author or editor or publicist. i love young people and i love old people. i could see myself working in a day care of a foster home or a nursing home. i could see myself doing so, so many things. the only thing i take certainty in is that i will continue (god willed) traveling the world until the day i die.

Tuesday, June 2, 2015


last night, i posted this picture on my instagram page:

with the caption that reads, 
"i'm posting this bc it's an image i want a lot of girls to see. the first picture is me without any make up on, and the second is a picture with a full face of products. i'm not the most confident person in the world, but i'm learning to be comfortable in my own skin- whether i'm all dolled up or not. so so often, girls post impossibly beautiful pictures of themselves and especially celebrities photoshop themselves to be hardly recognizable and then we look at ourselves and wonder, "why can't i look like that?" the reason you don't look like the woman on the billboard is bc she is not real. start embracing real beauty, girls! don't let photoshop or likes or followers or society's standards get in your way! learn to feel beautiful in your own (untouched!) skin."
i posted this picture on instagram, and now on my blog, to encourage other young women to love themselves! recently after i posted my picture, my dear friend ashley posted a 
b e a u t i f u l
picture of herself, saying that i inspired her to do so! i'm not posting this for attention, or to say that i think i'm pretty with make up, it's simply to show my followers/friends that i am learning to love myself for who i really am. i hardly ever post a picture without any make up on, and the overwhelming comments i got made me feel prettier than ever.
i hope any women reading this get the inspiration to also post a picture of themselves without any insecurity! own your beauty- pimples, wrinkles, stretch marks, splotches, red marks, bumps, grease, sweat and all!!!!